Chasing magic

So I started reading Chasing Magic by Stacia Kane. I like the series so far and have continued to read. One thing that I do have a problem with is all the self doubt. Yeah, I know we all have it and experience it from time to time yet it has been a reoccurring issue in the past several books. I know that it has to do with her being a drug addict and trying to survive "life" but sometimes it just feels like too much. 

I guess maybe because I am somewhat going through a lot of that minus the drugs and I really don't want to read about it anymore. One of the things that I like about this character is that despite what she thinks and everyone else she proves all of them wrong and still manages to get what needs to be done, done. I just feel like my life has come to a point. A point in which I must make that decision that will affect different outcomes in my life. I went to someone last week and they told me, after I asked about this stasis, that the only way that I was going to be able to move past it was by making a decision. It didn't really answer my question or help me find a way to get there. She mentioned either going back to school or actively finding another job. She did hit it nail on when she mentioned the whole healthcare but that is not where I want to end up anymore. So again I am left with many questions that have no answers. She did clarify that the job situation will be the same. That there would be no difference in money. So I guess if I did find another job it would pay the same. She did mention if I was thinking about buying a "new" car, when I answered no she said that it was a possibility in the next year. That started a whole new bout of what ifs....... To say the least I hope that if there is a new car in my future it wont be because something bad happened to the current one. Who know maybe I win one or something. What I was hoping that she would tell me was if there was someone new in my life that will stay there. NOTHING. She mentioned nothing what so ever about it. I was thinking of doing a full session with her but its 150 that I could use for something more productive. Like all these trips that I want to do.